Men...what's that?

Who among us has not pondered the reasons that attract us to the object of our affections?

Most of us come up with stuff like intelligence, looks, humour, etc etc. Some of us scratch our little heads, wonder for a while, and then brush off such unnecessarily complicated thoughts to return to channel surfing on the TV at 1:30 a.m.(that's me!).

Science has a different answer to this question, though. One of the primary reasons for love or attraction to the opposite sex (I'm sorry folks, for now we shall tackle only heterosexuals - someone keeps telling me that I'm terrible at multitasking), is propagation of the species. In fact, this could well be the sole reason, scientifically speaking. In other words, all our traits - physical, intellectual etc are geared towards finding the best potential mate (ewww...rotten term), with the optimum combination of genes, who will ensure that our species continues to thrive.

Given that this scientific mumbo-jumbo has been drilled into our brains since our first biology classes in school, imagine my surprise when I discovered that males as a sex, can one day become totally redundant!!

A lot of women will now snicker and think, 'Hey, we always knew that guys were useless, we didn't need science to tell us THAT'! Dolly the sheep and cloning probably put this idea in our heads first, but now with parthenogenesis being spotted even more commonly in the animal kingdom, guys, you sure have another reason to worry!

Simply put, parthenogenesis is a form of reproduction by females (only) of various species without any inputs from the male of the species. This is sometimes spotted in aphids, bees, reptiles (the komodo dragon) and even birds and sharks ( hammerheads, white spotted bamboo sharks. It can also be induced in other species under laboratory conditions. Human embryos have been produced using parthenogenesis (i.e. without any sperm at all), but these are so far used only for stem cell research.

The natural progression of thought says that with the advances in science that we see everyday, the day is not far when human parthenogenesis for reproduction and 'propogation of the species' becomes a reality.

So all you women out there who are driven up the wall by the men in their lives, despair not. It's only a matter of time till men gain the distinction of having become totally useless in every sense of the term :)and we women would then have the option of having a male, human version of Sony's Aibo to amuse ourselves with!

P.S.: We would then always have the option of pulling the plug or simply taking out it's batteries when it starts leaving dirty clothes on the floor and wet towels on the bed!

The house of GIANT mangoes

Remember the days when a girl twirling around in her spotless white frock with a bunch ladies crooning ‘Washing powder Nirma, Washing powder Nirma’ in the background made memorable advertising and sold tonnes of detergent?

A large chunk of brands that Gen Y (people born in the 80’s and early 90’s) grew up with developed a distinct personality using just one tool from the marketing armoury – good ol’ advertising. There was Britannia with its ‘Tink tink ti tink’ , ThumsUp asking us to taste its thunder, Maggi that could be had in ‘Just 2 minutes’, or Cinkara that could revive any ‘bechara, kaam ke bojh ka maara’.

Cut now to the present, where marketers are FAR better equipped to attack the simpering targets – you and me. Behind every tree, bush and mouse click are brands waiting to ambush us with pop up ads online to ad flyers with our credit card statements to free cookies, complimentary shampoo sessions and foot massages at malls to Hrithik Roshan wanting to drink only Bournvita in his super hero blockbuster ‘Krissh’ (which, by the way had 36 other brands that were peddled by our masked super hero!!).

Hey, but this isn’t really news to any of us, right? Spot on.

What ‘I sighted’ today was a crazy blend of the 80’s and 90’s delivered in typical post millennial fashion. Frooti (yes, yes, you’re now humming ‘Mango Frooti, Fresh and Juicy’ in your head) just launched their new TV commercial with a complete guerilla approach to the whole affair.

Taking a leaf out of reality TV, dozens of unsuspecting passersby were ambushed (yes, again) by giant, 9 foot high mangoes falling from trees right at their feet. The looks of shock / surprise / nonchalance (!) recorded using 8 hidden cameras, and each episode integrated seamlessly to form one whacky ad. No script, no models, no tall tales, just pure mango pleasure (as Frooti’s competitor would’ve said). 

Check out this link to see the actual commercial: Frooti goes guerilla! 

Really smart combination of old world TV advertising with the flavour of the season; spy cams; to communicate the brand essence ‘surprisingly juicy mango juice – Frooti’.

So if you thought hidden cams in changing rooms were your only worry, think again, you might just unwittingly star in “Attack of the killer mangoes – Episode 2”.

Go figure!

How many of us could do 500-125 in our heads at the age of 6, in 30 seconds flat? Count me out. (In fact, I'm not sure if I can do that even now in 30 seconds flat :P)

Which brings me to this waist high, chubby, colourfully pigtailed little girl who sells jewellery on the 09:03 Thane - Mumbai CST local train. Dressed in a long floral skirt and a matching top, this little girl scampers between rush hour crowds in the Ladies Compartment, carrying 2 trays loaded with clear plastic jewellery cases on her head between plump ladies squabbling over the '4th Seat', harried latecomers trying to squeeze into the compartment and women peacefully dozing on their neighbours' shoulders.

Speaking of neighbours, the college girls sitting beside me were the reason this little girl now stood expectantly in front of my seat, her soft black eyes filled with the hopes of a good early morning sale. After much picking and choosing, one of the girls finally settled on a 'pearl and diamond' jewellery set.

"How much?" she asks and the little girl replies "150 rupees".
"Way too much! I'll give you 100 rupees for this" says the college girl, "No aunty, that's not even my cost price."(Economics at 6!)
"Ok, 110 rupees then." says the girl, as her friends snicker at 'aunty'. "Make it 125, and I'll not ask for a penny more" says the cherub with a sudden smile displaying a perfect set of pearly whites.
The girl, taken aback by this new tactic in haggling, quietly hands over a 500 rupee note to the kid.

It was at this point that I really got interested and what did I know, amazed too. Within seconds, the kid whipped out two hundreds, two fifties and then with another hundred rupee note in her hand came to me asking "Aunty (grr..), could you give me change for 100 rupees?"

I handed over the change to her, she carefully counted out the notes and gave exactly 375 rupees to my neighbour. Filled with a mixture of admiration and pity, I asked her "Do you go to school?". She looked my way, gave me a smile as bright as the knickknacks in her tray and said with pride "Of course! I'm in first grade"

As she gathered her wares in preparation for her next pitch, all I could do was wonder whether this little kid working the suburban trains each morning was a victim of oppression or a fighter; whose job helped her educate herself, adding wings to an already nimble mind.